Feeling

Not gonna lie these last two months have been an emotional rollercoaster and a half. I’ve been feeling all the feels sadness, anger, disappointment, frustration, fury, love, depression, elation, happiness, pain, bliss, optimism, longing, and so many others. It’s been terribly wonderful. A necessary journey of growth and learning. It’s not my first rodeo, I’ve felt all of these things before, during a variety of different life events, and I can guarantee I’ll feel them again, but each time is different, unique in its own right. I’m sharing this not for empathy or support, I’m sharing this because I want to normalize being open and honest about how we feel. 

To feel is such an essential part of our human experience. To allow the emotions to flow through us and by allowing to eventually let go. Not to feel is to deny experiencing a full life. Not to feel is to deny growth, evolution of self, and connection with others. Not feeling does not stop emotion from rising within but rather causes it to fester beneath the surface, only to present itself later to destroy the things we’ve worked so hard to build. 

There are certain teachings that describe ascending to a higher consciousness as the ability to separate from our feelings. I’m no guru or anything but my inner knowing tells me that to ascend as a human is not to not feel but rather to feel with acceptance and awareness, to feel without succumbing to the baser nature of those feeling, without allowing those feelings to rule our lives. 

I love my feelings, even the ugly ones because without them I wouldn’t be me. That isn’t to say I find feeling my emotions easy, on the contrary, it is incredibly difficult. To feel means being vulnerable and painfully honest with yourself, and sometimes with others. Feeling is so hard that most people find it easier to deny their feelings altogether, insist they are fine, then several months or years later they end up right where they started with no idea how they got there. 

So I guess what I’m trying to say is whatever you are going through, feel. Allow yourself to feel. It’s not weak or stupid. It is essential to becoming, to learning to love and live with yourself. That way the next time you ride an emotional rollercoaster of your own you can do so with an underlying sense of peace and ease, and an overwhelming sense of love for yourself and your journey xx